In the Air Book

It' s fun, it' s depressing, and many can identify with it in one way or another. Ringham is a little tormented, and he watches lives and lives from his own little universe, Airworld. While telling his tale, we find that he seems at least unconsciously conscious of his own mistakes, but finds every possible reason to explain them in his own head.

They take us on a trip through a few whole lives of his, allegedly close to a big change in careers (he hopes), and all his side effects, paraanoid hallucinations, families and relations seem to be getting in the way, diverting him, stealing leagues and doing whatever it takes to keep him from achieving the one thing he's most enthusiastic about:

1,000,000,000,000 mph. Planned to leave Airworld after his performance has been achieved, he has already done everything to do so, but as his journeys proceed, things go out of control, boyfriends become foes, and one possible leadership after another breaks apart - mainly because of his own pride and inclination to ridicule everyone in his time.

In the beginning he will tell you that he doesn't want to speak about him, because it's not right to do that in Airworld, so he will tell you his history instead. At the end the last two pages put everything together and we find out why Ryan is the way he is.